Valera (valera) wrote,

every time something goes very wrong, the desire is to fuck myself up in some way. either by smoking 'till my lungs turn black, getting piss drunk, or something similar.

destructive tendencies are fucked up, eh? wonder where that instinct comes from. is the though behind this something like "oh, i messed up badly now.. let me fuck up even more so nothing else would matter"?

well oh well. i'm looking forward to seeing tim this weekend. ;-)
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